Ok , this title is a bit misleading… but only sort of. I talked to my Dad tonight. I asked if it would be possible, on weekends when I don’t have the kids, if I could come stay with him and the family. I was nervous, as I wasn’t entirely sure what he would say. But he was kind and sweet and caring and said that I am always welcome. He asked me what was going on and I shared. To sum it up – I need some space. The energy in the house, when the kids aren’t around has been negative and depressing lately and I honestly can’t stand it. I find it to be making me anxious and since I’m not typically an anxious kind of person, it helps me realize just how much I need a break from it.
I may go check into a hotel somewhere, I may go stay at a friends, and now, if I need to, I have the option of staying with my dad. Having those options makes me feel better about things.
My housemates and I sat down and discussed budgets and plans. I am planning on being out of here and into a new place by April 1st. And no, that’s no fools joke. I feel better now that we all sat down and planned things out. Everyone is on the same page. I know what I have to contribute to the house, and worked out a very detailed budget for myself in order to meet the savings goals I have set. All of that, plus my tax return and my bonus, I will be more than capable of buying a home and covering the moving costs and having a small cushion for those home owner surprises that are bound to come up. I’m proud of myself. I’m not always very good at speaking up. I’m far too often “the nice one” who ends up being a doormat. And I’m not doing that now. I’m taking care of me and the kids first – everyone else comes after that. It’s a first for me. And oddly – it feels good.
Today was day 1 of 3 of a very intense review session of the work I’ve been doing since October. So far, things are going very well. I’m proud, and relieved, and nervous as there are still 2 more days of this. Everything I’ve been building and documenting and testing is being analyzed and picked apart. I have to have reasoning and data to support every decision I’ve made and have to have contingency plans already prepped and ready in case something isn’t approved. It’s been a very long few months with a ton of hours, even travel to get this far. In roughly 2 weeks, my part of this project will be complete. Another check in the box, another project to add to my portfolio – but this one is a bit different. It’s the first time I’ve looked at this industry (TV and cable) and in the past, I’d probably pass on it. It wasn’t glamorous or exciting enough. But I’m trying to build the start of something to re-shape and re-think the way we think about our TV’s. It’s not there yet – but it will be…and it’s kind of cool. 🙂
Well – I better get some sleep. Another long day tomorrow. Thankfully, no reviews tomorrow, just a day full of meetings with all my direct reports. Goodnight neverland.
