Today, I went with my bro to pick out and purchase an engagement ring for the woman he’s been seeing. It was fun to watch him agonize over the right ring, dreaming about his future with this lovely woman. He had a set budget, he’d been saving for a while. She didn’t want anything extravagant, which was lucky, as his budget wouldn’t allow for that. It was, truly, a very sweet moment in his life. I felt honored to be apart of it.
When the saleswoman brought him the total, his face fell. He was $100 short. He confessed that even if it had been on the nose, he’d have less than $50 to live on till he got paid. I applied for a credit card through the jeweler. I didn’t actually think they’d approve me for one, as I’ve certainly never been acceptable in the past. But surprise of all surprises, they approved me. It was a great moment… I was able to help my brother out and I purchased a Christmas gift for myself. I won’t get it back until just before Christmas, but I fell in love with a gorgeous white sapphire ring and decided to add it to the purchase. I can’t wait to get it! 🙂
I never purchase things for me, and I won’t lie, I felt a little bit guilty on the way home about it. But, when I think about it, I always put others first. I always buy things for the children. I certainly never buy jewelry, and seeing as I’ve been helping the bro do research on rings and gems lately, I’ve certainly drooled over quite a few lovely pieces. I’m really not much of a jewelry girl. A few friends of mine live by their accessories and fashion pieces. Me? I will often wear one ring on each hand. I rarely wear earrings and if I wear a necklace, I’ll wear it for 6 months straight and forget about it. Maybe it’s laziness… or maybe I’m just prefer to keep it simple.
The bro was commenting in the jewelry store, how he can’t wait to settle into life a bit more. How he looks forward to surprising his wife with an anniversary band or a tennis bracelet. I nodded and smiled, but struggled to relate to his excitement over this. I’ve never been in relationships where the other person was one to give jewelry. Or even gifts. Come to think of it, I’m not even sure I’d know what my reaction would really be. I almost think it’s easier to buy stuff for yourself. You know what you’re spending, you know your own tastes – so you’re guaranteed to love it, and you know it’ll fit. 🙂 Those are wins all around.
I think it’s a rather old fashioned ideal that my bro shared today. Men buying their women jewels. The feminist in me says – there’s no need to do that. But the lady in me smiles and thinks it’s sweet. I suppose it really just makes me think of my grandparents. Granddad would buy nana a new piece of jewelry on every cruise they’d take. Occasionally, he’d buy her a some type of bling for her birthday or for christmas or an anniversary. I loved watching her light up every time she’d put something on that he’d given her. She’d tell me the story around each item and I always enjoyed admiring how pretty she looked as she sparkled.
Well folks – I hope you had as lovely a day as I did. Much love to you all. Goodnight.
Women are a strange lot. (Although men are too.) We over analyze everything. We plan our weddings when we’re six. We are constantly looking into the future. I fall into this trap often. You get a text or email from someone, and you instantly start looking into a deeper meaning behind their words. You start a new relationship (note to self: Dating seems to be FILLED with opportunities to future trip – AVOID at all costs) – and immediately start thinking about whether or not this person will be in your life in the future and what that future will look like. 
I have a MOUNTAIN of stress on my shoulders right now. And thanks to that stress, I’ve challenged myself to not let myself get tripped up by my own future. No future thinking will be tolerated or allowed from myself until the new year. That seems like it would be relatively simple. In theory, it means that I will instead, live each day for the moments while I’m in them. Focusing on making each new day brighter and better than the last. Sure, I’ll trip up a few times. I’ll have to smack my own hand when my mind wanders – but maybe it will allow me to work through all this stress and drama that is present in my life.