The absolution of aging

aging

When we’re young and looking for love, we hide our flaws and imperfections.  Hoping that they will be overlooked, or better yet, somehow found to be an asset rather than a hindrance to the overall package we have to offer to a significant other.  Then when you find that person, you can embrace the idea of aging together.  Lovingly pointing out the new grey hairs that come in, the wrinkles that deepen, the hair loss, the weird moles that suddenly start to sprout hair… all of that fun jazz (please note the sarcasm there).  Aging together WITH someone, is almost charming, because at least you’re both falling apart together.  The new love handles your significant other suddenly has becomes a new endearing quality that just makes you love them that much more.

But what happens when you’re aging and in the dating world?  Do you try and hide these imperfections?  Even knowing that we are ALL going through them?  Do you use bottles of just for men, or shimmy your body into a tightly fitting girdle in order to appear younger or fresher?  Why?  If we’re all going through it, age is something we can’t turn away from, our bodies slowly give away and reveal their weaknesses to others around us as we grow old.  This is something we, none of us, can escape from; and yet, you’d likely be hard pressed to find anyone in the dating scene over 30 who doesn’t still try.

I have a few greys.  Not many, I’m only 31 after all, but I’ve noticed 3 of them coming in.  I could pull them.  Yank them by their roots and try and pretend I never saw them. They’d grow back.  Instead, I’m embracing their presence.  Perhaps the silvery strands are there as little badges of honor, to remind me that life is rich and full and I’ve truly LIVED it.  And there’s a hell of a lot more to go!

I’m going to make an attempt in the next few months to embrace my flaws.  A little thinning hair – meh – who cares, it’s finally filling in.  I blame pregnancy.  Crows feet… yup – and I blame SMILING all the time.  The occasional blemish – hello Stress!! I am human.  I have faults, I have flaws.  And rather than hide these and pretend they don’t exist.  I’m going to simply embrace that they are me.  A part of me, whether I like them or not.  And maybe, just maybe, I’ll be able to grow old with the people I love and laugh about them all.  My friends and loved ones .. be warned.  I may just lovingly point out your flaws and adorable imperfections and encourage you to start embracing them too.  Hehe.  Don’t say I didn’t warn ya.