Staycation Part 1

It’s Sunday.  The house is quiet.  I am very obviously not on Orcas Island.  And … I’m completely okay with that.  I have no plans for myself for the next couple of days, and I’ve given myself one rule.  Think about (and accomplish) needs/wants only.  No stress or drama, no grumpiness, no pain.  Meaning:  No thoughts about work, no thoughts about moving, no thoughts that bring about sadness or pain.  Or at least try and remember to turn them off when they do occasionally pop up.

Yesterday was lovely.  I met with a friend for coffee, ran a few errands, and then disappeared into a favorite book store.  I filled my arms with books and hunted down a chair.  There was another woman there, and she was doing the same.  Her arms filled with books on dragons.  She had one I’d considered grabbing, as it covered the techniques of painting scales and certain textures.  I commented to her about it as she plopped into the seat next to mine and we ended up chatting about art and comics.  She’s a local artist.  Very nice woman.  We laughed about wanting to have a coloring party and exchanged numbers.  🙂

I talked to my little brother briefly yesterday.  My real brother, not the “bro” I live with. 🙂  He and I are both wanting some sibling time. He’s planning to come stay a night soon so we can stay up too late gabbing and laughing and sharing.  Then have horrible-for-you-but-oh-so-good breakfast diner food the next morning.  I’ve enjoyed watching him get older and become a young adult.  In my case, being significantly older than a sibling is interesting because you love them, and want to share everything you can with them, but know that age and maturity is a factor in understanding the choices that we make as adults or as parents.  So you don’t share everything.  Sometimes you just stay silent and stand back and watch.  I think he’s on the track to being a very cool man.  It will be interesting to see what he grows and becomes.

I came home and painted.  And painted.  And painted.  I had candles.  I had my entire music collection put into one playlist and set to “random”.  I had a glass of amazing red wine.  Ok, over the course of the night I had 2 glasses.  I was trying a new technique I’d found in a book.  I wanted to see if I could accomplish it.  I used a photo as a guide and went about trying to replicate the picture I’d found in the book.  I did it.  It’s not perfect, I somehow messed up half way through and Photoshop put a 30 px outline on all that was laid down.  So I had to go back and repaint a lot of what I’d already done.  I’m still new to painting on the computer.  It’s awkward for me, but I’m dedicated to figuring it out.  Blending just pisses me off on the computer.  You lose the ability to shade with your hands a lot.  But tablets and technology are giving me the opportunity to paint without the mess, in my living room with my feet up, relaxed.  Not hunched over an easel. I knew 3/4 of the way through that I wanted to finish my painting last night, and I knew it would hurt to do so.  My hands were cramping. 🙂 But I was so excited to see what took shape.

Should I show you all?  Please remember, I am not the original artist.  This is NOT my work… I mean – it is … I painted it.  But from a small photo.  I don’t feel right taking credit.  Shoot I feel even worse that I didn’t think to note down the original artist.  Or the book.  Bad Jen.  But here it is all the same.

Image

Life is good

Image

My birthday is in 3 days.  I’ll be 32.  Sometimes I still feel like a little girl – overwhelmed and inspired by everything I see.. And other times, the wise old soul in me comes out and I feel like I’ve been around on this planet a hell of a lot longer than just 32 years.  I’ve been through a lot.  I’ve seen the deepest darkest depths of hell and I’ve experienced flying on some of the most amazing and joyous heights.  I’m definitely on a high point these days.  Sure, I may have a grumpy moment here or there.  A moment when stress bubbles up and I just need a hug, but overall, I’m doing DAMN well.

Yesterday I spoke with my grandparents on the phone for a bit.  What struck me about it is that about half way through the call, I think my grandfather had an epiphany.  I think it dawned on him how cool his granddaughter is.  We were talking about music and books and movies.  I was telling him how you can learn a lot about a person by the books they have on their shelf, or the movies they collect or the music they listen to.  I mentioned how people at work will often giggle at my strange playlists that range from Beethoven to Ella Fitzgerald to Nirvana to Eminem and everything else in between.  He was telling me how I need to focus on building up a resource library so that anytime I need knowledge on a subject, that I can find something on my shelf.  I explained to him that I can skip the huge library and just rely on the internet to help me research.  He laughed and admitted to being a bit behind the times on that one.  It was a lovely chat.  He then put Nana on the phone.  She’s one of the few people in my life who can get me to spill anything and everything without even trying.  I ended up jabbering on about everything .. birthday plans, my upcoming getaway plans, the job, the kids, the bro, and … wait for it..the guy I’ve been seeing.  My mom would probably intake her breath in horror.  I can just hear her say.. “But Jenny!  They’re old fashioned, they don’t need to hear about your love life.”  Why the hell NOT?!  It’s not like I’m sharing EVERY detail.  I simply mentioned that I was planning a trip to get away, she asked if I was going with the kids and I said I was taking a special friend.  She knew the minute I said “friend” that it wasn’t a friend and giggled and said she was happy to hear that I hadn’t embraced monkhood.

Image

I gave her no details, other than his name… and simply said how I am happy in life right now.  And I could hear it… her sigh of relief.  I’m betting my family has seen how unhappy I was for a long time but never said anything.  I’m sure they thought – well – at least she has her kids and her career.  She may not have found love, but at least she can care for everyone she takes care of.  I’ve had a TON of people comment to me in the last 4 months or so at how happy I have become.  How it’s infectious and they just want to hang out all the time because it spreads to them too.  Yay!! 🙂  And here’s my confession to you my dearest readers… It’s a genuine, completely content, don’t know how I ended up here, wasn’t planned and was a total surprise, cheesy, giddy type of happiness.

I’m super stoked for my birthday plans.  Even tho, so far at this point, not everyone has RSVP’d.  Who knows – I could end up with just a handful showing – I invited a total of 30 people.  But I don’t care.  I know that the people who do show up will be the ones that I’ll have a blast with and that’s really all that matters.

I’m also planning a “weekend” getaway for mid April.  I’m stoked.  I need it.  A chance to get away to a place where there is no signal.  No TV.  No pressures.  I can sleep in.  The kids aren’t coming.  I can get up at the crack of dawn and go for a walk on the beach if I want.  I can build a bonfire and roast marshmallows.  Find a pretty shell or a tide pool with treasures in it.  The place even has a great looking spa.  Get a massage and soak in a hot tub.  BLISS!  I’m taking Monday-Wednesday off in order to go and do this…. and as much as I am LOVING my job right now, I feel like knowing this is officially reserved and booked is what is keeping me from losing my sanity hehe.

Image

Looks like there’s a big chance I’m going to be visiting Washington DC in June/July this year.  We have a big convention for partners at that time, and I’ve pitched that if they want to do some heavy research, that’s probably the best place to do it.  Should be fun.  I haven’t seen much of the east coast.  I won’t know for sure on the timing of all of that for another week or so, but I’m fairly positive they won’t decline my request to attend.  What I need to look into now is whether I can have someone come with me.  I did so much travel alone last year, I’m kind of over it.

So … let’s see what else is going on with me.

Fleetwood Mac is going back on tour.  I’m trying to convince the parents to go with me to their show in November.  They were one of my favorite bands growing up as a kid.  Who am I kidding – I have so many “favorite bands”.. I think I need a new phrase.  The last concert I went to with my parents was Super Tramp back in the 90’s.  Good concert… first time I ever witnessed people smoking pot.  I remember leaning over to my mom commenting on the old men who were smoking pot.  She laughed at me when I said “But mom – they’re OLD!”  Ahh youth.

Well – I better get on with my day.  Happy Wednesday!! 🙂 Love to all of you!